It’s that time of year again, folks. The week long celebration of Natalie Portman that we call… PORTMANIA 27!

Of course, this year, due to the upcoming tarrifs, we can only do a long weekend of celebrating. Four fabulous days of fun and excitement, starting TODAY! All leading to our naturally gorgeous leaders birthday on MONDAY!

So let’s get started this Friday morning with PORTMANIA!

This time we’re not just celebrating Natalie’s birthday! We’re also celebrating 25 years of PORTMANIA itself! That’s right! It all started in the YEAR 2000!!

25 years of hopeful excitement that’s always answered with mild disappointment!

The Year 2000. That was the year Where the Heart Is came out and Natalie was filming Attack of the Clones.  PORTMANIA burst on the scene and screamed “We’re Here To Arrange Your Furniture!”

We admit it was a bad slogan, that’s not what we were here to do at all. We were here to celebrate NATALIE PORTMAN! and we DID! For 25 years! The furniture arranging was just an added bonus!

Plus our car insurance rate comes down this year! NICE. 

So what will we do for this special once in a quarter century occasion? We had planned a full US military parade for the day, but SOMEONE already booked a US military parade for his birthday later in the month and they were like “We can’t do two.”

and we said “Well, what else have you got?”

And they said “This piñata and several bottles of liquor.”

And we said “WE’LL TAKE IT!”

I think we got the better deal now that it’s all said and done. 

And so day one of PORTMANIA is in the books! But it’s not over! There’s another day just hours away! And with it comes more PORTMANIA! More than ever! Buckets and buckets of it! Will it never end?  Come back tomorrow for DAY TWO and find out! 

You’ve Got Questions. We’ve Got PORTMANIA .