Instantly PORTMANIA
wella wella wella
alright dudes, PORTMANIA DAY FOUR has Arrived and ana sends in a PORTMANIA PICTURE!
and NOW can i take a moment and confess that i am afraid of FISH.
PORTMANIA TENSE.
DAY THREE of PORMANIA XIV and now what?!?
I DON’T KNOW.
no one wants to do anything except Carlotto who made THIS:
and its GOOD!!!
i’ve also been thinking and since natalie is turning 31 and she was 11 when she first started filming The Professional that means it’s the TWENTY YEAR ANNIVERSARY OF NATALIE BECOMING AN ACTRESS!!
well. that’s it.
a whole lotta PORTMANIA
A wise king never seeks out PORTMANIA, but he must always be ready for it.
DAY TWO!! are you guys ready? i’ve brushed my teeth and everything, dudes!
YES, the above gif made by Celina expesses the true feelings of all PORTMANIACS everywhere. and then SOME.
in our second exciting day we talk about THOR and look at a wallpaper by ANA and i tell you the secret origins of NATALIEPORTMAN.COM ITSELF.
Would you like to know more? (more…)
PORTMANIA XIV
in which Natalie turns XXXI.
and Ana comes along to start this baby in STYLE:
that’s right. My name is Sanjiro Jones. come with me now as we start the fourteenth PORTMANIA!! i remember the FIRST PORTMANIA. i was 22 years old. AND YOU WERE ALL BABIES. and now i’m an old man. and you are STILL BABIES!! WHAT THE?!
FIND OUT WHAT PORTMANIA IS AFTER THE JUMP
LATE NIGHT PORTMANIA
okay. so i kind of forgot.
DAY 3 OF PORTMANIA 13!!
I meant to make this update hours ago but i started watching Natalie on Letterman clips for inspiration and then THE DAY WENT BY.
but things i did do. made a list of Natalie Portman movies I haven’t seen:
My Blueberry Nights
Goya’s Ghosts
The Other Boleyn Girl
Free Zone
Brothers
Black Swan
No Strings Attached
Your Highness
The Other Woman
Hesher
ate three times.
looked up all the Grand Theft Auto games on wikipedia.
drew a picture of A BEAR.
NOW WHAT?!
ours is a forever PORTMANIA.
DAY 2 OF PORTMANIA 13
what can be done?!?! nothing but having a good time and drinking from the keg.
THIS JUST IN…the keg is done. POLITICAL DISCUSSION TIME.
i think that most people don’t realize that the thing to do is to… um… to fix the state of affairs for today we should… uh… SARAH PALIN IS AN IDIOT.
being thirty is hard…..BUT A NEW KEG HAS ARRIVED. so on with PORTMANIA 13 day 2 of four part one of six.
(more…)
The Dawning of The Age of PORTMANIA.
It can’t get any worse, folks.
PORTMANIA 13 starts today! right now. this MINUTE. and it’s already been a whole year since last PORTMANIA. we called it 12. what happened last time? i don’t remember. it’s probably better that way. but what’s happened since is Natalie getting pregnant and then getting engaged. and then winning an oscar. and then a pulitzer prize for PUNCHING. ONE OF THOSE IS MADE UP!
we’ll get started with this PORTMANIA in a few moments with you clicking a MORE button. and there will be more. fair warning. if you do not wish to click the more button I can hardly blame you…
3…
2..
1.
RADIO.
YO. Natalie is gonna be on the Mojo in the Morning radio show on 95.5 FM in Detroit this morning. at least i think so. i heard a commercial for…
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